If you’re anything like me, you know the feeling when everyone’s talking about New Year’s resolutions. They don’t always work, and even when they do, it’s often like the yo-yo effect of losing weight – a lot of wasted effort in the end. That’s why I don’t bother with them anymore. Though, to be fair, it wouldn’t be true to say I’ve never made any in the past.
Anyway, the reason for this post is simple – I want to create more in 2025.
(a) It’s not a resolution.
(b) It should be relatively easy, considering that in 2024 I only managed one post on this site. Over the whole year, I barely did any drawing (maybe a few pieces), didn’t paint at all, and even ended up shutting down my other website, ko-lor.com, probably because hmm. my art wasn’t selling?
What was up and what is up with me?
For years, I didn’t have any dreams. But last year, I sought some help and started working on myself again. I’m not making promises or setting big expectations, but for the first time in a long while, I feel like having even a small, positive vision for the future feels good.
What I’m trying to say is: when things are bad, they’re bad. And at some point, I let them go. I allowed myself to start from scratch. What helped me a lot – and saved me from even more trouble – was keeping the faith. First and foremost in God, then in myself, and finally in the people around me. But still, when it’s bad, it’s bad – don’t force it.
Journaling has been a helpful tool for me. Even though I often find it boring after a while, it’s still valuable. Which brings me to my next thought: seeing skills as tools, and life as a quest.
I’m not trying to brag, but with God’s help, I’ve managed to do the impossible more than once in my young life.
So chin up. I’m not “ready” for 2025, but I’m in a better place than I was in 2024, 2023, 2022, 2021… all the way back to 2014. It doesn’t sound like a long time, but for me, it was. I didn’t feel like myself for 10 years, but now, slowly, I’m starting to again.
Peace out,
Cezary
